Сьюзен Мейер – A Christmas Family Miracle: Snowbound with Her Hero / Baby Under the Christmas Tree / Single Dad's Christmas Miracle (страница 14)

“Eric went on doing what he was born to do, but our marriage began to suffer because we were on two divergent tracks. I loved him and didn’t blame him for who he was any more than he blamed me for my new role of motherhood. But with Philippe’s birth, I found out what I was really born to do.”

Except that her recent conversation with Raoul reminded her she could have a life off and on the ski slopes, too.

“I tried to salvage our marriage and begged him to move to Breckenridge with me. I thought that if he didn’t have your family and friends to depend on all the time, he’d come to rely on me again and we could recapture the love we’d once shared. But he didn’t want to leave home.”

Raoul wiped the corner of his mouth with his napkin. “My brother was too entrenched.”

“Exactly. Eric was too comfortable with the lifestyle he’d known all his life. He couldn’t see that he was leaving Philippe alone too much. That drive in him took over and left us behind. I kept hoping things would change, but they didn’t. The truth is, though I never said the words to him, if he hadn’t been killed, I would have divorced him.”

Something flared in the recesses of his eyes. “That I didn’t know.”

“Does it shock you?”

He frowned, staring at her as if he’d never seen her before. “What are you talking about? I loved my brother, but another woman would have left him long before then.”

She shook her head. “Even so, forgive me if I sounded disloyal just now.”

A strange sound escaped his throat. “I’m the one asking for forgiveness for sounding judgmental of you the other night about Philippe.”

“There’s nothing to forgive, Raoul. I have been punishing my son unwittingly by pretending I could erase the past.” But she’d found out that wasn’t possible, and her concern over Philippe’s future happiness was looming larger than ever.

She lifted her head. “Thank you for this incredible day. I’ll never forget you or your generosity. Now if you wouldn’t mind driving me back to the school, I need to get my car and go home so I’ll be there when Vivige brings him back.”

After dropping Crystal off at her car, Raoul drove home experiencing a new kind of pain. It wasn’t like what he’d suffered after Suzanne had died. Her death had been final. He’d had to accept it and get past it through sheer will and work.

But Crystal and Philippe were both breathtakingly alive and, worse, forbidden to him in the eyes of society and family. Raoul didn’t worry about either, but he knew Crystal did. After experiencing pleasure almost beyond bearing by being with her today, he could see his pain would go on and on with no end in sight unless he did something about it.

Desperate for relief, he reached for his phone and called his best friend. But all he got was his voice mail. Des could be anywhere, doing anything. Raoul left a brief message for him to phone, then hung up.

Desidiero Pastrana, a wealthy Spaniard and mountaineer from the Pyrenees, had arrived in Chamonix ten years ago to do some climbing. Raoul had been his guide and they’d struck up a friendship that had lasted and deepened over the years. They’d often traveled back and forth to do different climbs together, enjoying women until Raoul had met Suzanne.

When she’d been killed, Des had been there for him. They’d done a trip to Nepal that had saved his life. Raoul would always be indebted to him. Now he needed saving again because he was battling excruciating pain that was eating him alive. Des was the only person he could talk to about it.

Though he had a few other good friends, there wasn’t anyone else who had Des’s depth of character and understanding. He’d been through a hell as real as the one Raoul was going through now. Raoul could benefit from some of his wisdom.

After pacing the floor, he picked up the phone again, this time to call the nursing station at the hospital. The clerk answered. She told him the doctor had made his rounds and had given orders for the feeding tube to be taken out of Monsieur Broussard. He could go on soft foods in the morning.

Dieu, merci. Raoul thanked her and hung up. He’d needed to hear that good news, but it still wasn’t enough for him tonight. For once the solitude was killing him and Des might not get back to him for a while.

Unable to stand his own company, he put on his shoes and jacket, then left the house on foot for the nearest bar. He needed something to numb him so he could sleep. Anything at all to help him keep the lid on.

After Crystal left for Breckenridge with Philippe, he’d been in such a black void he’d had no interest in anything except to plunge into his work. That’s when he’d started making monthly phone calls to Philippe. It meant he could hear Crystal’s voice.

The talks with her son managed to keep him from going insane, but, by October, not even those ended up being enough. Finally one of his colleagues told him he needed to take a break, otherwise he would be no good on the mountain.

After his last unsatisfying few words on the phone with Crystal, he’d been on the verge of phoning her back to tell her he was going to fly to Breckenridge to see his nephew. Then his father had fallen ill and that’s when he’d firmed up his decision to go to Colorado and ask her to come back with Philippe.

Though he would never have wished for this scenario, his father’s illness had given Raoul the first legitimate excuse he’d been aching for. Ironically, now that Crystal had come, she and Philippe were still untouchable living in his parents’ home, and he’d never felt more alone in his life.

Walking faster, he approached the Après-ski Mont Blanc that featured a live band that brought in the crowds. Raoul went inside the lounge and made his way past partying tourists to find an empty table.

Before he could find himself a spot to sit, he felt someone pull on his arm. He turned around. It was a sister of one of the new guides he’d hired. She’d come around the office several times dropping unsubtle hints that said she wished he would ask her out. Hell.

“Bonsoir, Monique. You’re looking lovely tonight. How are you?”

The brunette smiled. “I’m better now that I’ve seen you. I had no idea someone like you mixed with a crowd like this. Are you alone?”

He’d thought he’d wanted a drink, but one look in her eyes and he knew he’d been a fool to come in here where he knew he’d be recognized.

“Actually, I was looking for a client wanting to arrange a climb, but don’t see him. I guess I kept him waiting too long, so I’ll have to catch up with him at the hotel. It’s nice to see you again.”

“You don’t have time for one little dance?”

“I’m sorry, but business has to come first.”

She pouted. “That’s what Gerard always says.”

“Your brother’s right. À bientôt, Monique.”

Raoul had no choice but to leave her standing there. Once out in the cold air, he took a long walk before returning to his house and closing up for the night.

He’d just come out of the shower before going to bed when he heard his phone ring. It could be several people on the other end. Maybe the hospital. He prayed there wasn’t an emergency and reached for it. The caller ID indicated it was Des. He clicked on.

“Salut, mon vieux,” he said with utter relief.

“Qué tal, Raoul. From what you didn’t tell me in your message, I figured you didn’t care how late I returned your call.”

“You figured right, as usual. How much time have you got?”

“You know better than to ask me a question like that.”

He threw on his robe and sank down on the side of the bed. “This goes way back.”

“After the hours I’ve leaned on you over the years when things got tough, I’m more than ready to listen to you.”

For the next half hour he unloaded to his good friend. It was therapeutic to finally let out all his anguish and suffering to someone he trusted.

A long silence followed. “Des?” he prompted at last.

“I’ve been thinking, mi gran amigo, and this is what you have to do.” For the next few minutes he laid out what Raoul’s instincts had already been telling him to do. He’d just needed corroboration from the man who was like a second brother to him.

“Jules!” Crystal met him in the hall the next afternoon walking with Vivige, who had her arm hooked through his.

“Isn’t it fantastique?” her sister-in-law cried.

“It certainly is.” Crystal hurried toward them and gave him a hug. “What does the doctor say now?”

“I can go home tomorrow provided everything’s normal.”

“That’s the best news I ever heard.” They walked back into his hospital room. Crystal helped him get settled in the bed.

Vivige kissed her father. “Now that Crystal’s here, I’m going to leave and get some shopping done. I’ll see you home tomorrow.”

“Wonderful. Now you run along and take care of your family while the two of us have a nice visit.”

Once she was out the door, Crystal pulled a chair up to the side of the bed where he was propped. “I like you in that robe.”

“Merci for buying it for me. I appreciated the flowers your parents sent, too.”

“Everyone wants you well, and now you look so much better, I hardly recognize you.”

He reached for her hand and squeezed it. “I wish I could say the same about you.” She gulped. “Don’t take offense, ma fille. You know I’m not talking about your looks. I’m talking about what’s inside here.” He patted his chest. “Tell me about your plans for the future.”