Shirley Jump – The Instant Family Man (страница 8)
“She doesn’t swim?” Luke asked.
Peyton shook her head, then lowered her voice. “She’s scared of the water. I don’t know where she got that from because Susannah and I loved the water.”
He remembered. A lot of his best memories centered around those times at the lake with Susannah and Peyton. Those were the best summers he could remember, before his life had taken a left turn he hadn’t seen coming. “That summer of senior year, I swear the three of us spent every single day at the lake. Me and Susannah and...” He flicked some water at Peyton. “Tagalong.”
Her cheeks colored at the old nickname. “It was just because there wasn’t anyone my age at the lake that summer.”
“Jack and Mac were there.”
“Your brothers?” Peyton snorted. “They were always busy. Jack, off hanging with his own friends and Meri’s family. As for Mac, he never wanted anything to do with any of us. I swear, Mac was born an adult.”
Luke laughed. “Very true.”
Then he sobered, because he thought of how long Mac had been gone, how his older brother’s absence had created a vacuum in the family. When they were kids, Jack, Luke and Mac had been the three musketeers, as their mother dubbed them, in trouble more often than not. But as they got older, Mac became the serious one, the determined one. He’d worry over his grades, obsess over every word in an essay, work harder and more than anyone else to keep the T’s crossed and the I’s dotted. He’d been the one who butted heads with their parents the most, the one who thumbed his nose at curfews and rules. The black sheep with the straight As, which made it awful hard to justify grounding him. The minute he was old enough to leave, Mac headed out of Stone Gap, his returns on par with sightings of Halley’s Comet.
Luke glanced over at Madelyne, sitting on the step, prancing a Barbie doll around the edge of the pool. She was his daughter, though he didn’t feel a single thread of emotional connection to what was, essentially, a child stranger. He could see their link in her features, in the way she cocked her head to study him, in the offbeat way she assessed people’s worth. In those ways, they were alike. And maybe he was hoping for too much, expecting some instant bond.
Madelyne, he realized, had a hole in her life now, too. One that was never going to be filled by a quick visit at Christmas, a few checks here and there. What was it the statisticians said? Kids raised with a strong male and female role model did better. They were happier, more grounded. Madelyne clearly already had a strong role model in Peyton, but Luke—
Well, no one was holding him up as an example of what to be when you grew up.
“So, what does this spending-time-with-Madelyne thing entail?” Luke asked.
Peyton grinned. “Don’t look so panicked.”
He waved a hand. “Does this face say panicked?”
She took a step closer to him, swirling water around their hips. She feigned deep scrutiny, peering into his eyes. Her perfume, something light and airy, wafted in the space between them. “Terrified.”
“Me? I’m only terrified of anacondas and great white sharks. Not kids.”
That made Peyton laugh. He’d never noticed her laugh before, but decided he liked the sound of it. “Wait till she’s having a complete meltdown because she wants to eat cake for dinner or stay up past her bedtime or buy that six-foot teddy bear at the mall. Then we’ll see how the big, brave bachelor reacts.”
“I’ll be fine,” he said, speaking with a confidence he didn’t feel. Hell, he could barely take care of himself. And the thought of being responsible for another person—
Damn.
“I’ll be fine,” he repeated, more for himself than Peyton.
The tease dropped from Peyton’s features. Her voice sobered. “You better be, Luke. A kid isn’t a watch you can return to the store because it doesn’t match your suit.”
“If you haven’t noticed, I don’t wear a watch or own a suit.” He tossed her a grin, slipping into the familiar role of class flirt. “And I’m still a big kid myself.”
“
For some strange reason, the fact that Peyton had noticed anything at all about him made Luke smile. Years ago, he’d barely known she existed, except as a thorn in his side when he’d been trying to be alone with Susannah. But now, standing in the water with this older, sexier, more intriguing Peyton—
“Auntie P? Can I play with my other dolls now?”
“Sure, sure.” Peyton strode out of the pool, reaching for Madelyne as the little girl was heading for the table where Peyton had placed their things. “Wait, let me get the bag for you.”
Luke’s gaze followed the cascade of water running down Peyton’s back, over her buttocks, down her shapely legs. There were a few things that improved with age. Cheddar cheese. Red wine. And Peyton Reynolds.
He reminded himself he wasn’t here for Peyton or for anything other than his daughter. He was trying to be responsible, for once in his life, and being responsible didn’t include lusting after his kid’s aunt.
He was a father now, whether he was ready or not, and that meant being a whole other person than the one he had been for the past twenty-six years. He could only pray he didn’t screw it up.
Peyton woke up on Monday morning with her stomach in knots. She lay in the hotel bed, staring up at the white popcorn ceiling for a good ten minutes before she heard Madelyne stirring beside her. Ever since Susannah’s death, Maddy had slept curled up against Peyton, one hand on Peyton’s arm, as if she was afraid she, too, would disappear.
Peyton placed a gentle kiss on Maddy’s temple, then lay against the pillows and did what she always did before putting that first foot on the floor—she ran through a quick mental to-do list, setting goals and ticking off tasks. The activity almost always energized her for the day ahead, infused her with that can-do spirit that had fueled her rise in one of the biggest interior design firms in Baltimore.
Today, though, lying there with a sleeping Maddy tucked beside her, the image of innocence, that to-do list was short and empty, sending a rising tide of panic through Peyton’s stomach.
Two days ago, Peyton had been sitting in her boss’s office, listening to him tell her that she had screwed up on a big job—missed an important deadline—and that she needed to get her act together if she hoped to stay at Winston Interior Design. “Take two weeks off,” he’d said, “get some reliable child care in place, a maid to do the laundry and a priority list that puts your job back at the top, and then come back.”
In other words, quit running out of the office because Maddy had a meltdown at preschool. Stop coming in late because Maddy hadn’t wanted to eat breakfast or get dressed. Quit leaving early because Maddy had been crying on the phone when Peyton called to check on her.
Not to mention how the added responsibilities and worries had taken a toll on Peyton’s sleeping and eating habits. She was a walking zombie at best most days. As much as she needed the sleep, the break, the mere thought of a day that stretched long and empty scared her. They had the trip to the zoo, then lunch, then a trip to the playground, dinner, bath, followed by the endless hours after Maddy fell asleep and Peyton lay in bed, thinking. Thinking far too much.
From the day the police had come to the door with their long faces and somber tones, Peyton had worried ten times more about Maddy than she ever had before. How would Peyton make this work? Would she be a good mother? A strong role model? Had she made the right choice coming here? Or would these days in Stone Gap make Maddy withdraw even more?
Peyton stared at the ceiling, her heart heavy, her chest tight.
Susannah had been a distracted mother at best, one who seemed perpetually in need of money or help, but she had loved her daughter fiercely, and Peyton always believed that when it came down to the wire, her sister would put Maddy above everything else. In the end, Susannah hadn’t had the chance.
Now Luke had a chance to step up and be a parent, but Peyton worried he would let her down—and worse, let Maddy down. If there was one thing Maddy desperately needed, it was structure, stability. Luke had never been the kind of guy who built fences and planted vegetable gardens and ate dinner at six.
She needed to remember that when she met Luke at the zoo in a little while, and not delude herself into thinking that just because the man was handsome, and seeing him caused a little flutter in Peyton’s gut, that the three of them were forming some kind of happy little family. She was doing all this for her niece—not to resurrect some silly teenage crush.
All Peyton wanted was to help Maddy become a happy little girl again. Stone Gap was the best place Peyton knew of for Maddy. Here, where the town sprawled among the lush green landscape, there were memories in the streets and the houses. Memories of Susannah, of Peyton, and a foundation for Maddy, who had stood on shifting sand for far too long.