Сара Морган – One Night in Buenos Aires: The Vásquez Mistress (страница 11)

He stood there like a mythical god—lean, arrogant and impossibly handsome, seeing everything from one point of view only.

His own.

‘One day you’ll learn that you can’t control everything in life, Raul. Accidents do happen,’ she said hoarsely. ‘I am living proof of that, but it doesn’t matter any more, does it?’

He drew breath, ready to challenge that remark as he automatically challenged everything and she lifted a hand in a defensive gesture.

‘No!’ She cut him off before he spoke. ‘Just don’t say what’s on your mind, Raul, because frankly I don’t think I can sit through another session of your thoughts on the subject.’

‘You don’t know what I was going to say.’

‘Oh yes I do. It would have been something along the lines of “if you hadn’t got pregnant we wouldn’t be married now” or “it’s lucky for both of us that you lost the baby.”’ She’d been trying so hard not to think about the baby, but now there was no escaping it and her eyes filled with the tears that she’d been choking on for the past couple of weeks. ‘Well, do you know what? I don’t feel lucky. I know it wasn’t what you wanted and to be honest, I was surprised myself—but I don’t feel lucky, Raul. I minded that I lost the baby.’

He was so tense that every muscle in his powerful frame throbbed with it. ‘I know.’

‘You do not know! How could you know? I protected you from it. You were in New York on business. I was devastated but I kept it to myself because you were tied up with that meeting, takeover—’

‘It was a merger.’

‘I don’t care what it was! I just knew it was important to you and I didn’t want to cause you extra stress. But I shot myself in the foot, because you decided that the reason I didn’t tell you about my miscarriage was because I was afraid you might call off the wedding.’

‘It was a natural assumption.’

‘Only for a man like you, Raul. Any other person would have thanked me for being so thoughtful and selfless.’ She turned her head, her voice a whisper. ‘Go away. Just go away. Why are we even talking about this, anyway?’

‘Because we are married,’ he bit out harshly. ‘And we have to sort this out.’

‘Some things just aren’t fixable. And this is one of them. Do you realise that you haven’t once thought about my feelings? All you’ve thought about is yourself. You think I trapped you. Well, do you know what?’ Her voice rose. ‘I wish you had ditched me at the altar. You would have been doing us both a favour.’

‘I would not have done that. Despite what you think, I do have a sense of decency.’

‘Decency? Where was your sense of decency when you said it was a good thing I’d lost the baby?’

He stiffened, his handsome face pale despite his tan. ‘You are taking my words out of context.’

‘I wish I was, but I’m not. And frankly, I would have preferred you to have broken it off, than to find myself married to a cold, insensitive bastard.’

He inhaled sharply. ‘I’ve never heard you use language like that before.’

‘Well, if you stick around, you’ll be hearing more of it.’

Raul ran a hand over his face. ‘You are extremely upset—’

‘Yes. Funny that, really. I lose a baby, discover that my husband is a cold-hearted, ruthless pig, get run over—’ Her heart was pounding so rapidly that she felt dizzy. ‘I can’t imagine why I’d be upset.’

‘You need to calm down. The doctors said you shouldn’t be subjected to any more stress.’ Raul lifted a hand in what presumably was a gesture of conciliation. ‘Why are we going over this again? No me importa. I don’t care. It’s history now. We have to move on.’

‘Where to, Raul?’ Faith choked, holding it together by a thread. ‘You’re relieved, but that isn’t how I feel. I feel terrible. You have no idea. Our relationship is dead and so is—’ She broke off with a whimper of pain, unable to finish the sentence. ‘I wish there had been a baby.’

‘I know you do.’ Raul’s tone was grim and his face was white with the strain. ‘Which is why you should have left me six months ago for some homely, domesticated male whose sole desire was to reproduce and spread his seed. You should have ended it instead of forcing me into something I didn’t want.’

‘It was an accident.’ She covered her face with her hands to hide the tears but clearly she was less than successful because she heard Raul swear and then felt his thigh brush against hers as he sat down next to her.

‘Stop crying. I’ve never seen you cry before. You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met.’ His strong fingers closed around her wrists and he pulled her hands away from her face, as if he could ease her distress simply by the force of his will. ‘And you wonder why I am so against marriage as an institution! Until we exchanged vows, we were happy together.’

She sniffed. ‘It isn’t marriage. It’s you—the way you are—’

‘And you always knew the way I was. We both knew it, Faith.’ Raul’s tone was rough. ‘There was never any future for us. Eventually you would have wanted marriage and babies. It was inevitable.’

‘I hadn’t even thought about it.’ Furious with herself for crying, Faith wiped her eyes with the palm of her hand. ‘I had a career when I met you. The last thing I was thinking of was playing happy families.’

‘When you discovered how badly you wanted a baby, you should have left.’

‘How are you so successful at negotiation when you don’t even listen to the other person?’ Faith bit back a hysterical laugh. ‘That wasn’t how it happened! I did not plan it. I had a whole career ahead of me. Plans! When I discovered that I was pregnant, I was in shock. But then I realised how much I wanted our baby.’ And him. She’d realised how much she wanted him.

‘And the fact that I didn’t wasn’t of importance to you?’

‘You asked me to marry you!’

‘Because you left me no choice.’

His blunt admission sliced through her control and brought the tears to the surface. ‘Well, that’s romantic. And having admitted that you married me because I “forced” you, you now want to continue this relationship? Are you mad, or what?’ The tears trickled down her face and Raul’s sensual mouth tightened.

‘Don’t cry.’

‘Why?’ The tears fell harder. ‘Because it makes you feel bad? Well, good. At the moment, I want you to feel bad.’ The utter desolation echoed in her voice and she saw his emotional turmoil.

After a moment’s hesitation he reached out a hand towards her but she shrank away from him and he let it fall to his side. ‘How did our relationship reach this point?’

‘I don’t know. I was so in love with you.’ Her voice was thick with tears. ‘I didn’t think anything could ever damage what we had. I thought we were invincible.’

‘And presumably that’s why you did it.’ His voice grew several degrees colder and she knew that she would never convince him that she hadn’t become pregnant on purpose.

‘So just divorce me,’ she whispered, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. ‘Divorce me for unreasonable behaviour.’

‘There won’t be a divorce.’ His tone was hard and icy cold. ‘You chose this path, cariño. Now walk it. I have some calls to make. Make sure you rest before dinner.’

CHAPTER FIVE

WHAT was she supposed to wear for dinner?

She’d fled from Argentina with nothing more than her passport. She certainly hadn’t stopped to pack a wardrobe.

Glancing at her watch, she realised that there were still several hours until dinner, so she picked up her bag and stepped into the elevator.

They were in the centre of Buenos Aires. How hard could it be to find something simple and practical to wear?

She pressed the button for the ground floor, thinking of Raul. He’d changed so much and she didn’t have to look far to discover the cause of their problems.

By becoming pregnant she’d committed the ultimate sin.

The lift doors opened and she gave a gasp of shock because Raul was standing there, anger shimmering in his dark eyes.

‘Do you have a death wish? You are supposed to be resting.’

For a long, agonising moment the tension throbbed between them momentarily blinding both of them. She was painfully aware of his sexuality and her stomach swooped and spun like a ride at a funfair.

Suddenly, looking at his rigid shoulders, she realised that they’d never stood a chance.

They were worlds apart; not just in terms of wealth, but in life experience and culture.

They’d talked all the time, but never about his past, and she was only now realising how little she knew about him.

The phone in his pocket rang and he removed it, scanned the number and then took the call. ‘Sí—I am aware of that.’ He switched between Spanish and English with effortless ease and Faith listened with reluctant admiration, trying not to be impressed but failing because his razor-sharp intellect had always given her a buzz. She’d loved arguing with him because his brain was so fast and challenging him had always resulted in lively debate.

As if sensing her scrutiny, his eyes locked onto hers and a muscle flickered in his jaw. ‘No—cancel. I don’t care, I’m busy right now. They can wait until I’m ready.’

Faith watched as he broke the connection with a decisive stab of one long finger and dropped the phone back into his pocket. She cleared her throat. ‘If you were cancelling a meeting because of me then you shouldn’t have bothered.’