Rachael Thomas – Red-Hot Affairs: The Crown Affair / Craving Her Enemy's Touch / A Lone Star Love Affair (страница 18)

‘I don’t see why. Can you honestly say you didn’t use me?’

‘This isn’t about me.’

Laura nodded and took a deep breath. ‘OK, fine. The day I was made redundant I got home early to find my boyfriend at the time with his secretary. In our bed.’

‘Ah.’

‘I know. Tacky, or what? They’d been having an affair for three months, would you believe, and I hadn’t a clue. I’d rented my flat out when I moved in with him and, what with three being a bit of a crowd, I couldn’t exactly stick around. So I trawled through the websites of a number of rental agencies and found the cottage in Little Somerford and I left.’

‘What a jerk.’ The hammering urge to hunt her ex-boyfriend down and pummel the living daylights out of him thumped Matt in the chest, taking him completely by surprise.

She blinked. ‘Well, yes. But I guess he wasn’t wholly to blame.’

‘Seems to me that that kind of behaviour is inexcusable,’ he muttered, wondering exactly where such a violent reaction had come from.

She bit her lip. ‘True, but I was too easygoing, too easy to please. Too afraid of confrontation. I let him get away with too much. I let him walk all over me.’ She shrugged.

Easy-going? Afraid of confrontation? Matt nearly fell off his chair. That didn’t sound like the Laura he knew. Since the moment he’d met her she’d been feisty, fearless and determined.

Snapshots flew around his head. Of Laura on the path, batting her eyelids and pouting. Arching her back on his sofa and staring up at him with that come-hither look. Sitting in his office, limbs crossed, chin up as she told him she wasn’t leaving.

His stomach churned with a weird combination of lust, admiration and something that felt suspiciously like jealousy.

‘Which has kind of been the story of my life,’ she was saying. ‘Much as it pains me to admit it, I have been a bit of a doormat.’

Matt dragged himself back to the conversation. ‘You could have fooled me,’ he muttered, his voice not betraying any hint of the confusion battering his brain.

Laura grinned. ‘Ah, well, that’s because after the double whammy of losing my job and my boyfriend I went on an assertiveness course.’

‘That sounds dangerous.’

‘It was. Very. Module One was entitled “How to Embrace Confrontation”. Module Two covered learning how to say no. And Module Three focused on how to get what you want.’

‘You must be a fast learner.’

Laura nodded. ‘Like lightning.’

‘For someone allegedly afraid of confrontation,’ he said dryly, ‘you’re pretty good at it.’

She grinned and his stomach swooped. ‘It’s turned out to be surprisingly liberating. As has going for what I want and saying no.’

Sometimes saying no wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. Sometimes the only word a man wanted to hear was yes. In exactly the breathy pleading way she’d said all those little yeses that afternoon.

‘Anyway. Change is good, don’t you think?’

‘Depends on the change,’ Matt muttered, struggling to keep his focus on reconciling the Laura he knew to the one she described and not on the yeses. ‘Where did the pushover tendencies come from?’

‘My parents’ divorce when I was thirteen, I suppose.’

‘Tricky.’

‘Very.’

‘Amicable?’

She winced. ‘Hideous.’

‘I’m sorry.’

Laura shrugged. ‘Things had been bad for years, even though at the time it all seemed so sudden. I think I probably compensated by trying not to put a foot wrong, in the childish hope that if I was good enough they’d stay together. Which was nuts, of course,’ she said. ‘I know it had nothing to do with me and they’re far happier apart, but I guess old habits die hard.’

‘If ever.’

Laura shook her head. ‘Ah, you see, that’s where you’re wrong. My people-pleasing days are well and truly over.’

That was a shame.

The thought slammed into Matt’s head before he could stop it and stayed there flashing in neon, reminding him just how well she’d pleased him.

‘Anyway why the sudden interest?’

Matt shrugged and shoved the thought aside. ‘I’m interested in all my members of staff.’

For a second there was an odd sort of stunned silence. Laura’s face paled and Matt felt a chill suddenly run through him as if the sun had disappeared behind a cloud.

She blinked. Bit on her lip. Nodded slowly. ‘Of course,’ she said in a strangely soft voice, getting to her feet a little jerkily. ‘Right.’ She nodded again. Ran her hands over her hips, pulled her shoulders back and flashed him an overly bright smile. ‘Well, as a member of staff, and a brand-new one at that, I ought to be getting back to work. Thank you for the wine.’

Before Matt could ask her what the matter was, Laura had spun on her heel and was stalking off in the direction of the hedge as if she couldn’t get away fast enough.

He watched her disappear through the gate, bewilderment pummelling at his brain. What the hell was all that about? Matt rubbed his face. He’d thought their conversation had been going swimmingly. He’d got to the bottom of her sabbatical and was just beginning to discover what made her tick. And even more surprisingly, he’d found himself enjoying her company.

So what had happened? Had he said something? Done something?

God. He swore softly under his breath. He was famed for being decisive, intuitive, shrewd and for having a certain ruthlessness that had made him a billionaire by the time he was thirty. He’d built up a multimillion-pound business from scratch. He’d negotiated impossible deals and turned the most desperate of companies around. Now he was running a country with every problem going.

Yet he’d never understand women. They were completely unfathomable.

Even Alicia, who’d been so transparent and straightforward, had eventually become incomprehensible. Matt’s jaw tightened as the memory of his ex-fiancée filtered into his head. Her lack of guile had been one of the reasons he’d asked her to marry him. She hadn’t tried to wrap him up in complex emotional games. Their relationship had been easy, light and fun.

Until he’d started to get more caught up with his business. As it had grown he’d had to devote more and more time to it and less to her.

At first she’d been remarkably stoical, supportive even, but even the most understanding fiancée would have got fed up eventually.

Matt had been torn, and while the relationship limped on for a while it hadn’t survived. The end had been messy and painful. Hurtful accusations had flown all over the place. Guilt and blame had built and built, until things had finally erupted. The only thing that had kept him sane during and after their break-up had been his work.

Now he avoided relationships like the plague. They were perplexing, unpredictable and ultimately emotionally destructive, and he never wanted to go through all that again.

Matt set his jaw and put everything back into the hamper. Laura was perplexing, unpredictable and he had a horrible suspicion she could be pretty emotionally destructive.

So there’d be no more seeking her out, he thought, getting to his feet and heading back to the palace. No more lunches. No more conversation. And definitely no more wanting her in his bed.

When their paths crossed he’d be cool and distant. Because he was far better off alone. Always had been, always would be.

Staff, thought Laura for the billionth time that afternoon. Huh.

Disappointment and hurt scythed through her all over again and she threw down her chisel before she could do any permanent damage to the frieze she was working on.

God. How stupid could she be? If only she were wearing steel-capped boots she could have given herself the kicking she deserved. Because she was such an idiot.

She closed her eyes for a second and felt her cheeks burn as her mind hurtled back to the rose garden. There she’d been, going all soft and squidgy and mellowing with the wine and the sun and the heat of Matt’s gaze. Bizarrely she’d found herself enjoying the conversation despite it dredging up things she’d rather not think about. It had actually been a relief to talk about the old her, and she’d discovered she rather liked the person she was beginning to become.

Unfortunately there hadn’t been a hint of arrogance, nor a patronising glance in sight. And while Matt had been annoyingly persistent he hadn’t interrupted her and he hadn’t dismissed anything she’d said. In fact the way his body had tensed and his eyes had blazed when she’d told him about her ex had had her heart leaping with something she wasn’t sure she wanted to identify and desire whipping through her so fiercely that she’d begun to wonder why exactly business and pleasure shouldn’t mix.

And all the time he’d just been interrogating her as he would any employee.

Agh. Laura opened her eyes and scowled. The fact that she was still smarting over it two hours later was infuriating. And what was making things worse was the knowledge that she didn’t have any real reason to smart. Which irritated her even further.

Because Matt was right. She was staff.

So what was she getting so het up about?

Laura plonked herself on the floor and chewed her lip. Was it really the fact that he’d wangled so much personal information out of her without divulging even his age, which was what she’d been telling herself for the past hour or so?