Karin Baine – Midwife Under The Mistletoe (страница 6)
‘I thought I’d swot up on PKU while I was waiting for you.’
The admission made her do an about-turn. ‘Me? What on earth for?’
Their contretemps over the decorations immediately sprang to mind, along with that back-of-the-neck tingling sensation. Her pulse apparently thought she was in a sprint and other parts of her were reminding her it had been a long time since she’d been with a man and she should simply acknowledge this growing attraction for her colleague. If the opportunity arose to get close again, she couldn’t be certain common sense would get any say in the matter when her hormones were currently doing all the talking.
‘I thought you might need help moving in.’ The expression on Fraser’s face displayed concern rather than an intention to seduce her. He was the innocent party in the lurid fantasies her overtired mind insisted on conjuring up.
‘I’ll just have to reschedule for the next time I’m free. Whenever that might be.’ Her need for sleep now was more vital than assuaging Fraser’s apparent guilt that she’d been held up and she wished she’d never broached the subject with him. It put her in a no-win situation. Saying no to him wasn’t going to help their already strained relationship but letting him trespass into her private life wasn’t going to be comfortable for either of them.
‘Call it my apology for yesterday. I could’ve handled things better.’ Hands in pockets, he gave a shrug and appeared even less of a tyrant than ever. None of that was helping Iona maintain that wall of steel she tried to surround herself with at the merest hint of a too-alpha male. Sincere apologies and taking responsibility for anything weren’t traits often associated with such domineering personalities. She should know.
On this occasion Iona had to consider the possibility she might have been mistaken in her assessment of Fraser McColl. Then she could stop being so hard on herself for being drawn to him. Unfortunately this humble side of him decreed a compromise on her part lest she become the sort of obstinate-to-a-fault twit she despised.
‘Me too. I should’ve asked before I did my sugar-plum fairy act. I got a bit carried away.’
‘Really? I hadn’t noticed.’ There was that grin again and Iona wondered if it was reserved for the privileged few or it only made appearances out of working hours. It was unnerving that she even wanted to know what her relevance was to the rare sighting.
‘It’s my first Christmas in my own home, free from demanding family members, messy flatmates and fussy co-workers. Excuse me for being a tad over-excited.’ It spoke volumes that the first purchases for her new place had been an abundance of Christmas paraphernalia instead of essential household appliances.
‘I can’t say I understand the need for the fuss but each to their own as long as it doesn’t leak onto the premises again.’ Fraser verbally slapped the back of her hand but she’d had much worse from other men she’d inadvertently ticked off in the past.
‘What do you have against Christmas anyway?’ Since they appeared to have embarked on a truce, Iona thought it best to find out as much as she could about the elusive doctor before the clock chimed and he transformed back into his monstrous alter-ego.
She could see the inner struggle he was having as to whether or not to share the reasons behind his anti-Christmas stance in his hesitation to reply. He was watching her as though judging if she was trustworthy enough to keep his secrets.
Eventually Fraser sighed and said, ‘My mother died on Christmas Eve. I was six when they first discovered she had breast cancer. I haven’t really celebrated since, packed off out of the way to boarding school when she first became ill. Come to think of it, I don’t remember ever celebrating even before I associated her death with Christmas. It’s just not a point in my life I’m keen to relive every year.’
The heartfelt explanation shook Iona to her core—she had never expected such an honest and bleak insight into his background. As someone whose job was all about families and protecting young children, it was only natural Fraser’s story should get her choked up. She knew how traumatic it was to lose a mother but at such a young age he must’ve suffered dreadfully.
It explained a lot about his negative outlook on the season and she winced at how tactless her actions now seemed with hindsight. The shock of seeing those decorations would’ve brought those painful memories flooding back to him and it was no wonder he’d been angry at her. She was sorry that he’d been denied the joy in sharing Christmas with family but she didn’t want to pry too far into his personal life and jeopardise their ceasefire. It wasn’t as though she was keen to discuss Christmases gone by either.
‘I understand that and I’m really sorry for your loss but if you ever need someone to sprinkle a little Christmas magic, you know where to find me.’ It wasn’t a serious offer when it was probably too late to change his opinion on the subject but she did manage to get him to smile.
‘I certainly do but don’t let my hang-ups encroach on your obvious enthusiasm. You’re perfectly entitled to celebrate however you choose, in your personal life.’
‘It is a big deal for me this year,’ Iona said apologetically, understanding his point of view but also determined to go all out for herself.
‘In that case, we should start with getting you moved in properly.’ Fraser turned off the lights and ushered her towards the door so he could set the alarm.
Ready or not, her new best friend was coming home with her for the night.
‘LET ME GET that for you.’ Fraser made a grab for the door while balancing a heavy cardboard box in his other hand.
‘It’s fine. I can manage.’ Iona, who could barely be seen over the top of the stacked boxes in her arms, insisted on doing it herself.
‘No problem.’ He took a step back so she wouldn’t think he was trying to crowd her. Iona was so independent Fraser always felt he was in her way somehow, even though she would never have managed to move all of this on her own.
None of this had been in his plans tonight. He had, instead, been anticipating another quiet night in with nothing but the clock chimes echoing through the house to disturb him. It had been his guilty conscience preventing him from walking away from the whole situation when he’d heard from other staff members how excited she’d been about moving in tonight.
Iona nudged the door open with her bottom but he wasn’t sure how they were going to manoeuvre her belongings up the narrow staircase leading to the flat above the shop.
‘Sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. It’s just...this is a milestone for me.’ The apology was as much of a surprise as the tears he could see making her eyes shine like glossy chocolate. It was clearly an emotional moment for her and probably for more than the reasons she’d given him. He’d experienced something similar when he’d taken over the family home after his father had passed away, believing it was going to be the start of his new life with a wife and children, surrounded by love for the first time. Before then, being on his own had been something he’d simply taken for granted because he didn’t remember life before it.
Even if he hadn’t had his hands full, Iona didn’t give him a chance to pry any further as she made her way upstairs. Clearly the sharing of personal information was only coming from one direction tonight. Fraser had surprised himself by telling her about his mother’s death. It wasn’t something he usually told people and certainly not those he had trouble getting along with. However, he did want to explain his behaviour surrounding the Christmas issue so she wouldn’t hate him too much. Since she hadn’t slammed the door on him, Fraser had assumed he’d made the right move.
He’d kept finding excuses to stay behind at the surgery tonight—paperwork, the weather, waiting for news on the Gillens—but as soon as Iona had arrived he’d realised he’d been waiting to see her again so he could make it up to her for spoiling her plans. He had been sure she would come back to make preparations for the next working day and he suspected his overtime had been driven partially by curiosity over that frisson between them last night. It had definitely been attraction on his part, unexpected and somewhat inconvenient since they were co-workers and not harmonious ones at that.
Wandering the empty corridors of his family home, Fraser had little else to focus on other than his work and now that it had become entangled in his personal life it was impossible not to spend the night thinking about Iona.
He didn’t know what he’d expected to come of seeing her after hours but he certainly hadn’t imagined going home with her. With their history he’d never thought she’d actually agree to let him help.
It wasn’t immediately obvious if her concession was for purely practical reasons or if she, too, was keen to explore that new chemistry between them. He wasn’t about to ask when any possible answer was sure to unsettle him more. A dalliance with a colleague was totally out of the question, too disruptive, too close to home, and it had disaster written all over it. He couldn’t afford to have his love life screwing things up at work when he was just beginning to get things the way he wanted.