Грэм Грин – Travels with my aunt / Путешествие с тетушкой. Книга для чтения на английском языке (страница 12)

“What an extraordinary arrangement.”

“It worked very well. When Jo was in his fifteenth room he told me – I was back that week in Milan on my tour and I came out to see him with Mr. Visconti on my day off – that it really seemed at least a year since he had moved in. He was going on next day to the sixteenth room on the floor above with a different view and his suit-cases were all packed and ready (he insisted on everything being moved by suitcase, and I had found a second-hand one which was already decorated with labels from all kinds of famous hotels – the George V in Paris, the Quisisana in Capri, the Excelsior in Rome, Raflfes in Singapore, Shepheard’s in Cairo, the Pera Palace in Istanbul).

“Poor Jo! I’ve seldom seen a happier man. He was certain that death would not catch him before he reached the fifty-second room, and if fifteen rooms had seemed like a year, then he had several years of travel still before him. The nurse told me that about the fourth day in each room he would get a little restless with the wanderlust, and the first day in the new room he would spend more than his usual time in sleep, tired after the journey. He began in the cellar and worked his way upwards until at last he reached the top floor, and he was already beginning to talk of revisiting his old haunts. ‘We’ll take them in a different order this time,’ he said, ‘and come at them from a different direction.’ He was content to leave the lavatory to the last. ‘After all these luxury rooms,’ he said, ‘it would be fun to rough it a bit[74]. Roughing it keeps one young. I don’t want to be like one of those old codgers one sees in the Cunard[75] travelling first-class and complaining of the caviar.’ Then it was that in the fifty-first room he had his second stroke. It paralysed him down one side and made speech difficult. I was in Venice at the time, but I got permission to leave the company for a couple of days and Mr. Visconti drove me to Jo’s palazzo. They were having a lot of difficulty with him. He had spent seven days in the fifty-first room before the stroke knocked him out, but the doctor was insisting that he remain in the same bed without a move for at least another ten days. ‘Any ordinary man,’ the doctor said to me, ‘would be content to lie still for a while.’

“‘He wants to live as long as possible,’ I told him.

“‘In that case he should stay where he is till the end. With any luck[76] he’ll have two or three more years’.

“I told Jo what the doctor said, and he mouthed a reply. I thought I made out, ‘Not enough.’

“He stayed quiet that night and all the next morning, and the nurse believed that he had resigned himself to staying where he was. She left him sleeping and came down to my room for a cup of tea. Mr. Visconti had bought some cream cakes in Milan at the good pastry-cook’s near the cathedral. Suddenly from up the stairs there came a strange grating noise. ‘Mamma mia,’ the nurse said, ‘what’s that?’ It sounded as though someone were shifting the furniture. We ran upstairs, and what do you think? Jo Pulling was out of bed. He had fixed an old club tie of his, the Froth-blowers or the Mustard Club or something of the kind, to the handle of the suitcase because he had no strength in his legs, and he was crawling down the passage towards the lavatory tower pulling the suitcase after him. I shouted to him to stop, but he paid me no attention. It was painful to look at him, he was going so slowly, with such an effort. It was a tiled passage and every tile he crossed cost him enormous exertion. He collapsed before we reached him and lay there panting, and the saddest thing of all to me was that he made a little pool of wee-wee on the tiles. We were afraid to move him before the doctor came. We brought a pillow and put it under his head and the nurse gave him one of his pills. ‘Cattivo,’ she said in Italian, which means, ‘You bad old man,’ and he grinned at the two of us and brought out the last sentence which he ever spoke, deformed a bit but I could understand it very well. ‘Seemed like a whole lifetime,’ he said and he died before the doctor came. He was right in his way to make that last trip against the doctor’s orders. The doctor had only promised him a few years.”

“He died in the passage?” I asked.

“He died on his travels,” my aunt said in a tone of reproof. “As he would have wished.”

“‘Here he lies where he longed to be,’” I quoted in order to please my aunt, though I couldn’t help remembering that Uncle Jo had not succeeded in reaching the lavatory door.

“Home is the hunter, home from sea,” my aunt finished the quotation in her own fashion, “and the sailor home from the hill.”

***

We were silent for quite a while after that as we finished the chicken à la king. It was a little like the two minutes’ silence on Armistice Day[77]. I remembered that, when I was a boy, I used to wonder whether there was really a corpse buried there at the Cenotaph[78], for governments are usually economical with sentiment and try to arouse it in the cheapest possible way. A brilliant advertising slogan doesn’t need a body, a box of earth would do just as well, and now I began to wonder too about Uncle Jo. Was my aunt a little imaginative? Perhaps the stories of Jo, of my father and of my mother were not entirely true.

Without breaking the silence I took a reverent glass of Chambertin to Uncle Jo’s memory, whether he existed or not. The unaccustomed wine sang irresponsibly in my head. What did the truth matter? All characters once dead, if they continue to exist in memory at all, tend to become fictions. Hamlet is no less real now than Winston Churchill, and Jo Pulling no less historical than Don Quixote. I betrayed myself with a hiccup while I changed our plates, and with the blue cheese the sense of material problems returned.

“Uncle Jo,” I said, “was lucky to have no currency restrictions. He couldn’t have afforded to die like that on a tourist allowance.”

“They were great days,” Aunt Augusta said.

“How are we going to manage on ours?” I asked. “With fifty pounds each we shall not be able to stay very long in Istanbul.”

“Currency restrictions have never seriously bothered me”, my aunt said. “There are ways and means.[79]”

“I hope you don’t plan anything illegal.”

“I have never planned anything illegal in my life,” Aunt Augusta said. “How could I plan anything of the kind when I have never read any of the laws and have no idea what they are?”

Chapter 8

It was my aunt herself who suggested that we should fly as far as Paris. I was a little surprised after what she had just said, for there was certainly in this case an alternative means of travel; I pointed out the inconsistency.

“There are reasons,” Aunt Augusta said. “Cogent reasons. I know the ropes[80] at Heathrow”.

I was puzzled too at her insistence that we must go to the Kensington air terminal and take the airport bus.

“It’s so easy for me,” I said, “to pick you up by car and drive you to Heathrow. You would find it much less tiring, Aunt Augusta.”

“You would have to pay an exorbitant garage fee,” she replied, and I found her sudden sense of economy unconvincing.

I arranged next day for the dahlias to be watered by my next-door neighbour, a brusque man called Major Charge. He had seen Detective-Sergeant Sparrow come to the door with the policeman, and he was bitten by curiosity. I told him it was about a motoring offence and he became sympathetic immediately. “A child murdered every week,” he said, “and all they can do is to pursue motorists.” I don’t like lies and I felt in my conscience that I ought to defend Sergeant Sparrow, who had been as good as his word and posted back the urn, registered and express.

“Sergeant Sparrow is not in homicide,” I replied, “and motorists kill more people in a year than murderers.”

“Only a lot of jaywalkers,” Major Charge said. “Cannon fodder.” However, he agreed to water the dahlias.

I picked my aunt up in the bar of the Crown and Anchor, where she was having a stirrup-cup[81], and we drove by taxi to the Kensington terminal. I noticed that she had brought two suitcases, one very large, although, when I had asked her how long we were to stay in Istanbul, she had replied, “Twenty-four hours.”

“It seems a short stay after such a long journey.”

“The point is the journey,” my aunt had replied. “I enjoy the travelling not the sitting still.”

Even Uncle Jo, I argued, had put up with each room in his house for a whole week.

“Jo was a sick man,” she said, “while I am in the best of health.” Since we were travelling first-class (which seemed again an unnecessary luxury between London and Paris) we had no overweight, although the larger of her suitcases was unusually heavy. While we were sitting in the bus I suggested to my aunt that the garage fee for my car would probably have been cheaper than the difference between first and tourist fares. “The difference,” she said, “is nearly wiped out by the caviar and the smoked salmon, and surely between us we can probably put away half a bottle of vodka. Not to speak of the champagne and cognac. In any case, I have more important reasons for travelling by bus.”