Sam Green was really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really looking forward to his eleventh birthday.

I mean: really. He couldn’t wait. In the days leading up to it – his birthday was on the eighth of September – he simply wouldn’t talk about anything else.

“Have you sorted your school bag, Sam?” his mother, Vicky, would say in the morning.

“I’m thinking an Adventure Time cake this year, Mum,” Sam would reply. “With Finn, Jake and Ice King figures. What do you think?”

“I think you should get your school bag sorted,” she’d answer.

“Do you want to play football?” his friends would say to him at break-time.

“What about a magic party?” he would reply. “You all come, having learnt a different magic trick, right, and then we each perform it in turn – me last, of course – and then … where are you going?”

“To play football,” they’d answer. “Break’s nearly over.”

“What would you like for dinner?” his dad, Charlie, would say to him and his younger sister, Ruby, in the evening.

Ruby would open her mouth and say:

“Actually” – she said “actually” a lot – “I fancy shep—” but before she got any further Sam would be saying:

“I’d like a telescope. And a skateboard. And new trainers. And a guinea pig. And a tool kit. And an iPod. And some of David Walliams’s books.”

“—herds pie,” Ruby would say.

“For dinner, I said, Sam,” his dad would say. “Not for your birthday.”

Obviously, Sam wouldn’t always say these things (and so, obviously, the people he was speaking to wouldn’t always say those things back). No. Sometimes it would be a different type of cake, a different style of party and a different list of presents (although always including a telescope: Sam was a big fan of Star Trek, and sci-fi generally, and wanted to see as much of the solar system as he could from the window of his room in order to watch out for visiting aliens). Which did mean that he had ended up with a very long present list, and a very long selection of party-theme ideas. Which, in turn, presented a bit of a problem for his mum and dad, both in terms of choice and in terms of money, because they didn’t have a lot of that.

But the thing that never changed was Sam’s excitement about the day.

And then, finally, it came.

CHAPTER 2

UM …

“Oh, Mum! Dad! That was amazing! What an amazing day!” Sam was saying as he undressed in his bedroom. It was 10pm on Saturday the eighth of September. The last of his friends, all of whom went to Bracket Wood, the local primary school, had left. Vicky and Charlie were smiling at him.

“So! Did you like your party?” said Vicky.

“Yes! Especially the sci-fi cake! In the shape of the Starship Enterprise! With six different gobstoppers for planets all round it! And candy Klingons and other aliens on the sides! Great idea, Mum!”

“Yes, well, it was your idea, Sam … I think it was cake suggestion number four – you made it last Monday …”

“And the film-theme fancy dress really worked, didn’t it, Dad? Everyone’s costume was great! Barry Bennett looked brilliant as Gru from Despicable Me! And Ellie and Fred Stone as Minions! And Malcolm Bailey as the sloth from Zootropolis! And Morris Fawcett as Homer Simpson!”

“Well,” said Charlie, “that was your idea too. Party suggestion number seven …”

“And you looked great!” said Vicky, grimacing as she pulled off Sam’s Wall-E head and feet.

“Well, that’s why I won the Best Costume Prize …”

“No, actually, that’s because it was your party,” said Ruby, wandering into the room. She’d been allowed to stay up a little bit later as it was Sam’s birthday. Ruby had a tendency to be very direct about everything, in a seven-year-old way. But she was a very clever seven-year-old. “So everyone thought you had to win. In fact, Mum and Dad basically bribed all your friends to vote for you by giving them extra cake and—”

“Yes, all right, Ruby. Time to clean your teeth,” said Charlie, taking her hand, and leading her – a little forcefully – towards the door.

“Dad? Mum? For my birthday, can I have a kitten?” said Ruby as she was leaving the room, books tucked under her arm, to do extra homework as usual. This was another thing Ruby said a lot, as well as “actually”. Sometimes she combined them and said, “Actually, Mum and Dad, can I have a kitten?” Even when no one had asked her what she wanted.

“Well …” said Vicky.

“Um …” said Charlie.

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Джим Филд – Birthday Boy (страница 2)

CHAPTER 1 BIRTHDAY BOY

CHAPTER 2 UM …

CHAPTER 1

BIRTHDAY BOY

CHAPTER 2

UM …