Ариана Баженова – Intertwined Fates (страница 3)

That evening I slid down the wall, sobbing loudly and desperately trying to pinch myself to wake up and understand that it was a dream again, and not even a prophetic one. I lit a cigarette right there, sitting on the floor and not finding the strength to even go to the window. The remaining months before flying to the «city of angels,» I lay in bed, practically without getting up, watching the heroes of the next TV series with a dull gaze.

And then I made an effort, defended my diploma, packed my things and flew away to meet a new life. Maybe happiness awaits me here, in this gloomy city?

***

I tried not to pay attention to the power that allows me to sense many things and fulfill small desires with the power of thought. My parents passed on to me everything they knew. I also learned a lot from the old books in the university library.

But I really lacked a wise mentor who would help and teach me how to manage this power. During my youth, I had several strange episodes. People immersed in various spiritual teachings and practices showed great interest in me, but they only wanted to talk – no one offered me their mentorship, no one took on the task of teaching me. Once I worked part-time on weekends in a bakery, and I had the chance to work side by side with an elderly woman, cheerful beyond her years. In her cunning eyes, framed by wrinkles, a mischievous sparkle danced – she definitely knew more than others. She had a complicated history – according to her, she came from an old Indian family and had shamans and healers among her ancestors, but the growth of cities spares no one, and her parents left their native settlement, cutting off their and her path to secret knowledge. But the woman did not give up – the stories of her grandmother were deeply imprinted in her memory, and then from the right books and from like-minded people, she managed to collect information on how to control her power bit by bit.

One day, we went out for lunch together. Suddenly, she grabbed my wrist and nodded towards the open door of the warehouse, where no one could hear us. Her high voice and gesture were clearly impatient.

– We need to talk. Literally five minutes, – she blurted out

I nodded carefully, and we entered a dim room filled with boxes. She turned to me, and her dark eyes sparkled with strange energy and impatience. I looked at her with interest, trying to maintain composure and a polite smile on my face.

– I saw how they treat you, – she blurted out with poorly concealed anger. I understood – she was talking about the incident when my boss, who was not particularly smart, was passionately teaching me how to live, and I, as always, listened silently so as not to get into a conflict and do everything my way again. – You are a special, strong person. I have only met two people like you in my life, and I have had a long life.

I thoughtfully lowered my gaze, waiting for him to continue. The fact that they called me special caused mixed emotions. Probably, «special», «chosen» are beautiful epithets for Hollywood blockbusters, but in life it feels different. You are simply different, and if you do not learn to manage your features and strength, then you will live a senseless life, trying to avoid yourself.

– Only I see and feel that you do not know your strength at all and do not know how to manage it, you suppress the fire inside, trying to be like everyone else. It’s a pity that you obviously weren’t taught how to work with energy and magical practices in your time, otherwise you would now be more confident and would be twisting reality as you please, – she shook her head. – Now you will have to study it on your own, but you will cope. You have a lot of power, and people will always be drawn to you as a source to pump it out of you. You need to learn how to use your energy… to kill in order to protect yourself.

Interest flashed in my gaze. Despite the fact that her words could sound strange and even frightening, I understood what she was talking about. A lot of people have always been drawn to me, and I quickly became exhausted from their attention, so I learned to become «invisible» on an energetic level – usually I went into my thoughts and ceased to exist here and now, and they stopped touching me.

– I was younger than you when I killed you with my energy for the first time, I just smeared you on the wall. I was eighteen then. And you are already nineteen. Learn, the sooner the better! – She nodded again in confirmation of her words, looked me straight in the eye and pulled me towards the exit.

This episode now, two years later, was still vivid in my memory. According to her, I had to find my own way into the world of magical power. But how to do it?

Fortunately, a few months ago I suddenly felt that I needed to buy Tarot cards. Many people in Siberia were interested in the topic of magic and fortune telling, and finally I also decided to delve into this topic. As soon as I got my hands on the box with my first deck, unpacked it and began to shuffle it, a strange warmth and calmness spread through my hands and body. I learned to read the layouts almost immediately – and now I turned to them in moments of doubt to expand my understanding of the situation.

And yet, if only I had a mentor here in St. Petersburg!..

***

I immediately realized that this was a dream.

Making my way through a curtain of thick gray fog, I walked along a leaning concrete fence topped with barbed wire. In the distance, a black flock of crows circled in the air. I lowered my eyes and jumped slightly in fright – every step I took ignited the dry grass. I looked back and saw that the field behind me was engulfed in flames, but most of the grass had already turned to ash.

There was no point in running – it would only make the fire worse. I made my way along the fence to the entrance and saw a gate, behind which… a small marble temple was white, with a flock of birds circling above its dome. Looking around in fear and seeing flashes of fire engulfing everything around, I froze for a moment, doubting whether I should step onto the low steps of the temple and burn it down.

«Don’t be afraid. Get up. Your fire cannot harm the stone,» I heard a high voice from behind the front door.

With a sigh of relief, stepping onto the white marble, I got up and walked inside, passing a high arch. I squinted slightly, and when my eyes got used to the semi-darkness, I made out three figures in the white rays of the sun, calmly drinking tea at the table and chatting about their own.

«Who are you? Why are you three?» – I asked in a trembling voice, feeling the cold of the stone floor with my bare feet.

– We were waiting for you. Now there will be four of us – and we will help each other, – said a stately woman in a black robe and leaned forward slightly. I caught a barely discernible German accent. A ray of light outlined her delicate features and soft light hair. – I will guide you and lead you to where your fire will burn away everything unnecessary.

Before I could utter a word, a second man – tall and thin – moved towards me. The light did not pick out his features, and he remained in the shadows; I only saw a gleam of the thin frame of his glasses.

– I am completely confused.

I immediately realized that the high voice I had heard at the entrance belonged to him.

– I know and see a lot – in science, but I am blind in life. I do not know where I am going. I want your fire to light the way and warm me. You and I have known each other for a long time, but I am afraid to approach you, – he extended his hand to me from the shadows, and white light fell on a thin hand, on the ring finger of which a gold ring sparkled. – Save me. Find a way to me. Your fire does not burn in this temple of science – we must escape, but it is scary to leave the familiar for the unknown.

I looked at the hand with the ring, fascinated, and barely leaned forward, feeling a strange trust in this man. And I felt a closeness to him, enveloping me like a warm blanket, covering me with a wave. As if we had really known each other for a very long time.

– And she? – I pulled away with an effort of will to nod at the girl standing with her back to us. – What does she want?

I squinted and saw the same light hair as mine. She turned her head halfway, and I saw the dull look in her brown eyes – almost as dark as mine.

«Her fire doesn’t guide me anymore. She doesn’t want to leave here, from the familiar walls, nothing inspires her anymore. I… now it seems to me that I confused her fire with yours a few years ago,» the man continued a little more quietly, but I saw that the girl, remaining motionless, continued to listen. «Help me see, help me warm up, help me break out of the walls and escape into the unknown.» I involuntarily took a step back and glanced at all three of them.

«I will help you,» the stately woman in black continued. It seemed that this voice was used to giving orders that did not tolerate objections, but with me she was unusually gentle. «Trust me. I will take care of all of you. We are waiting for you…